In this world, one of the most beautiful relationships is the one between a mother and her child. The mother-son relationship is particularly strong because the mother views herself as the protector of her helpless son. With good mothers, this attitude continues throughout the child’s life, no matter the age. On the flip side of things, the relationship between the son’s wife and the son’s mother is usually one of the most contentious. The friction that exists between a wife and her mother-in-law has formed the basis of much comedy, playing on the stereotype of the relationship. As tough as this relationship usually is, there was no suck friction between Sita Devi, the wife of Lord Rama, and her three mother-in-laws.
The government’s foremost duty is to provide protection to the citizens. Therefore certain qualities are required of the people who are to provide this protection. Just as any job has a certain skill-set required for success, the job of a kshatriya, or protector, requires one to be brave, strong, courageous, and an expert fighter. These qualities usually aren’t found in people in the mode of goodness, the brahmanas. The brahmanas, or priests, are non-violent by nature due to the fact that they understand the non-duality that exists between living entities. There has been a strong push for equality amongst genders and races in recent times, but the Vedas go one step further by telling us that there is indeed equality amongst all living entities. Constitutionally, there is no difference between human beings and animals. Animals have the same type of soul as human beings because there are actually no differences between the souls of living entities. God is the supreme soul, Paramatma, and we living entities are all jivatmas, minute or ordinary souls.
Since kshatriyas are in the mode of passion, it is much more difficult for them to control their sexual urges than it is, say, for the brahmanas, who are in the mode of goodness. Due to this fact, kshatriyas are allowed to marry more than once in order to satisfy their sexual urges. In this way, sex life is sanctioned, but it still remains regulated. On the surface this may seem strange to us. “The Vedas allow for polygamy? Isn’t that for freaks and weirdos?” If the wife remains completely protected by the husband, then this sort of marriage system is actually okay. The other benefit to this system is that it reduces the likelihood of illicit sex because there will be less unmarried women in society. We see that famous rock stars, athletes, actors and actresses today are constantly finding themselves in trouble due to marital infidelity and other problems related to illicit sex. In fact, studies show that one of the best ways to avoid being in poverty is to wait until after you are married to have children, i.e. abstinence until marriage.
Therefore it was no accident that when Lord Krishna, God Himself, decided to appear on earth many thousands of years ago, He did so in the Ikshvaku family. Known as Rama, the Lord was the eldest son of the king of Ayodhya, Maharaja Dasharatha. Rama took a vow to only accept one wife. His one wife was no ordinary woman either, for she was Sita Devi, an incarnation of Goddess Lakshmi, the wife of Lord Narayana. Lord Vishnu is also known as Lord Narayana, Krishna’s four-handed form who resides in the spiritual planets of Vaikuntha. Though Rama accepted only one wife, His father had three: Kausalya, Sumitra, and Kaikeyi. Kausalya was Rama’s birth mother, but the Lord treated all of Dasharatha’s wives with the same level of respect. So in this regard, Sita Devi inherited three mother-in-laws at the time of her marriage.
The reason for the friction that occurs between mothers and the wives of their sons is quite obvious. The mother views herself as the ultimate caretaker of the son. She not only bore the child in her womb for nine months, but she nurtured the child through the early years. A good mother, or parent for that matter, is one who doesn’t care about being liked or disliked. They will lay down the law and nag and pester their kids to do the right thing no matter what. Sometimes, kids will become frustrated with their parents or even hate them at times but, in the end, they grow up to appreciate and respect them. The love that a mother shows towards her son never ends. Even if the son reaches adulthood, the giving of instruction and advice never stops. However, when the son gets married, the natural order of things gets shifted a little.
In Sita Devi’s situation, the potential for problems was compounded by the fact that she had three mother-in-laws. Yet from the above referenced statement, we see that her first twelve years of marriage were completely blissful. How was this possible? Sita was a pure devotee right from her birth. Though she never studied under a guru, she could actually teach anyone about the Vedas and the proper duties of a man and woman. She treated all of Rama’s mothers with love and respect and never had any friction with them. They all loved her and treated her like their own daughter.
This harmony existed because Sita was not only a great devotee, but she was living with God. The spiritual world is our natural home. Currently we are travelling in a foreign land, and the worst part about our trip is that we don’t know when it will end. Thankfully for us, Krishna and His bona fide representatives come to rescue us. The Vedas emanate from Krishna, thus they are non-different from Him. The various rules and regulations exist so that one can take the necessary steps to return back to the spiritual world. The devotees are pure liberated souls, meaning they can help others get out of the clutches of maya, or illusion.
