“The example is given that small lamps may become agitated by a little breeze, but the greatest lamp or the greatest illuminating source, the sun, is never moved, even by the greatest hurricane. One’s greatness has to be estimated by one’s ability to tolerate provoking situations.” (Shrila Prabhupada, Krishna, The Supreme Personality of Godhead, Vol 2, Ch 34)

Download this episode (right click and save)

1. When they fall into trouble

“I cringe. I cannot stand to watch. I know that I should not intervene. The children have to learn the lessons of life through experience. That is how I learned. I can try my best to give guidance, but I should not cushion the blow for them. I know that restraint is called for, but I still have a hard time witnessing the difficulty, in tolerating the vision of the obvious mistakes committed.”

2. When they ignore my advice

“I told them not to do it. I had sound reasoning and logic to back up my argument. I have no personal interest. I do not need anything from my children. Still, they did not listen to me. They went completely against my wishes. It is a great insult, and now there is the added pain of watching them suffer.”

3. When they curse at me

“What has this world come to? I never once spoke to my parents this way. We were always respectful. Sure, there was frustration. There was anger. There is lingering resentment. But they are my parents. They mean the world to me. I would never disrespect them. This new generation has it much easier. Maybe that is the problem. They have it too easy. They take our presence for granted.”

4. When they are suffering physical pain

“Is there any way for me to get the disease instead of them? I know that life doesn’t work that way, but I would gladly trade places. I can tolerate the pain, but I cannot stand to see them suffering. I am supposed to protect them, after all. That is my job. I must have failed.”

5. When they are lacking direction in life

“This is the worst thing to see, if you ask me. They are sufficiently educated. They are capable. They can do practically anything they set their mind to. The problem is their mind is not settled. They are lost in this world. They see no meaning to anything. They are drawn towards intoxicants, towards self-medicating to numb the pain of the reality of hopelessness. I want them to be hopeful. I want them to know what to do. I wish to see confidence based on assertiveness in striving to be the best person they can be.”

…

The contention from the acharyas of the Vedic tradition, in alignment with the interests of the Supreme Personality of Godhead, who is known by Vishnu among many other names, is that the common depiction of the Almighty as this old and angry figure is not valid. Though He can certainly present any visual He chooses, in accordance with the satya-sankalpa principle, anger itself is a defect. Bhagavad-gita explains how anger manifests.

ध्यायतो विषयान्पुंसः सङ्गस्तेषूपजायते
सङ्गात्सञ्जायते कामः कामात्क्रोधोऽभिजायते

dhyāyato viṣayān puṁsaḥ
saṅgas teṣūpajāyate
saṅgāt sañjāyate kāmaḥ
kāmāt krodho ’bhijāyate

“While contemplating the objects of the senses, a person develops attachment for them, and from such attachment lust develops, and from lust anger arises.” (Lord Krishna, Bhagavad-gita, 2.62)

The root cause is kama. This is desire in the material category. Kama is also lust. The pursuit of kama has one of two outcomes. Pass or fail. Get what you want or continue to chase. Anger is a byproduct of failure. There is some kind of frustration. The kama remains unsatisfied. That is the cause of anger, vengeance, resentment, hostility, and the like, in the manner of a spiteful king of heaven retaliating against the innocent people of Vrindavana for skipping worship in his honor just one time.

गोपैर् मखे प्रतिहते व्रज-विप्लवाय
देवे ऽभिवर्षति पशून् कृपया रिरक्षुः
धर्तोच्छिलीन्ध्रम् इव सप्त-दिनानि सप्त-
वर्षो महीध्रम् अनघैक-करे सलीलम्

gopair makhe pratihate vraja-viplavāya
deve ‘bhivarṣati paśūn kṛpayā rirakṣuḥ
dhartocchilīndhram iva sapta-dināni sapta
varṣo mahīdhram anaghaika-kare salīlam

“When the cowherd men of Vrindavana, under instruction of Krishna, stopped offering sacrifice to the heavenly King, Indra, the whole tract of land known as Vraja was threatened with being washed away by constant heavy rains for seven days. Lord Krishna, out of His causeless mercy upon the inhabitants of Vraja, held up the hill known as Govardhana with one hand only, although He was only seven years old. He did this to protect the animals from the onslaught of water.” (Shrimad Bhagavatam, 2.7.32)

If God chose to be angry and upset, He would have sufficient justification to maintain that disposition throughout the lifespan of the universe. After all, people have been ignoring Him since before anyone can remember. They keep trying to become Him, to be the highest purusha to the prakriti that is the material energy. God is the only Supreme Being. He is the only Purushottama.

A counterargument says that God is cruel for not being angry and upset. If He remains neutral to the entire affair, to the ups and downs in the material world, to the enjoyment and suffering that takes place in association with gunas, does that not make Him the meanest person of all?

पुरुषः प्रकृति-स्थो हि
भुङ्क्ते प्रकृति-जान् गुणान्
कारणं गुण-सङ्गो ऽस्य
सद्-असद्-योनि-जन्मसु

puruṣaḥ prakṛti-stho hi
bhuṅkte prakṛti-jān guṇān
kāraṇaṁ guṇa-saṅgo ‘sya
sad-asad-yoni-janmasu

“The living entity in material nature thus follows the ways of life, enjoying the three modes of nature. This is due to his association with that material nature. Thus he meets with good and evil amongst various species.” (Lord Krishna, Bhagavad-gita, 13.22)

We see from the above reviewed situations that for a loving parent, the relationship with the children is not easy. There is constant cause for concern. There is the potential to have all the love thrown back in your face. The children might cut you off entirely because of political differences. Radicalized from their time spent at the high-priced university, they now throw all these names at you. You have no choice but to accept the words, if you want to maintain the relationship.

“The Vedas, like the Mundaka Upanishad, as well as the Shvetashvatara Upanishad, compare the soul and the Supersoul to two friendly birds sitting on the same tree. One of the birds (the individual atomic soul) is eating the fruit of the tree, and the other bird (Krishna) is simply watching His friend. Of these two birds—although they are the same in quality—one is captivated by the fruits of the material tree, while the other is simply witnessing the activities of His friend. Krishna is the witnessing bird, and Arjuna is the eating bird.” (Shrila Prabhupada, Bhagavad-gita, 2.22 Purport)

The Upanishads compare the relationship between the jiva and the Supreme Lord to two birds sitting on a tree. Vishnu simply observes. The jiva indulges. They suffer or enjoy as a result. They can say whatever they want to the other bird. Vishnu will not change His disposition. The jiva only thinks they are suffering or enjoying. The experience is something like a dream.

We have the historical incident of Bhrigu Muni kicking the chest of an unsuspecting Vishnu. This occurred in the Vaikuntha realm. True to the depiction, Vishnu was simply lying down. He was not upset at the population of the material realm. He was not hankering after revenge or plotting the destruction of those who hurled wicked words His way.

Bhrigu committed an offense of the physical nature, but Vishnu was not upset, as a result. There was the understanding that Bhrigu is a saintly person, devoted to the principles of righteousness, dharma. There is always the potential to reform, if someone has gone astray. The door to the spiritual world is always open for those who genuinely wish to enter. This is the true meaning to spiritual life, to turn in the direction of the second bird and agree to follow His guidance, which is for the highest welfare of the jiva.

In Closing:

There the entire time,
Though difficult to find.

But now finally knowing,
So why not going?

For straightened direction true,
Comfort and loving nature too.

Like the child after led astray,
Hope finally with Vishnu to stay.

Categories: the five

Tags: children, dailyprompt, hare krishna, parenting, poem, poems, poetry