“Tulsi advises to serve Shri Rama with love and patience, while renouncing attachment to those considered dear, because it is Rama who makes the situation pleasurable, whether gaining or losing.” (Dohavali, 150)

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सेवा सील सनेह बस करि परिहरि प्रिय लोग।
तुलसी ते सब राम सों सुखद सँजोग बियोग ॥

sevā sīla saneha basa kari parihari priya loga।
tulasī te saba rāma soṃ sukhada sa~joga biyoga ॥

If we are lodged in between contradicting tasks, with responsibilities pulling us in opposing directions, wondering when we will find even a brief moment of relief to sit down and do nothing, it might be easy to dismiss saintly people and the way of life they are known for. We might criticize in the following way:

“Just look at these people. They do not work. They survive off the efforts of others. They are like parasites, but in the worst way, because they volunteer for this. It is not like they are stumbling through difficult times. It is not a passing phase. It is not like they only need a little assistance to get back on their feet.

“Rather, they have perpetually kicked up their feet. They live in a cave somewhere and chant mantras. They might write poetry that people find comforting, enlightening, blissful, and the like. That is fine and well, but what about those of us in the real world? These supposedly saintly people have no useful advice to give to the common person. We don’t have time to read poetry and ponder the meaning to the cryptic messages. We are busy making the world work.”

We see from a single couplet in the Dohavali of Goswami Tulsidas that there is both the positive and the negative in terms of proper direction in life. The anchor that is keeping us from progressing, and also a solution to the problems.

The saint who would fit the common characterization, with an accompanying image to match the stature, makes reference to something every person thinks about: priya loga. These are the ones near and dear to our heart. They are the people that we love. We tend to contemplate on the matter in two distinct ways.

1. Enjoying their association

This is when we are together. Birthday parties. Anniversary celebrations. Traveling to notable events such as baseball games, rock concerts, and movie premiers. We snap photographs to keep a memory of the time spent together. We would like to always be enjoying in this way.

2. Missing their company

The ways of the world are such that we cannot always be close to those who are dear to us. Perhaps a dear friend from college has moved far away to start a career. Elders within the family have passed on; this is the way of nature. People are always coming in the form of birth and also departing in the form of death.

नैकत्र प्रियसंवास: सुहृदां चित्रकर्मणाम् ।
ओघेन व्यूह्यमानानां प्लवानां स्रोतसो यथा ॥

naikatra priya-saṁvāsaḥ
suhṛdāṁ citra-karmaṇām
oghena vyūhyamānānāṁ
plavānāṁ srotaso yathā

“Many planks and sticks, unable to stay together, are carried away by the force of a river’s waves. Similarly, although we are intimately related with friends and family members, we are unable to stay together because of our varied past deeds and the waves of time.” (Vasudeva speaking to Nanda Maharaja, Shrimad Bhagavatam, 10.5.25)

As Vasudeva, the husband of Devaki, describes in Shrimad Bhagavatam, the waves of time carry people away, no matter how close they are aligned. We thus feel fortunate whenever we have the opportunity to meet, and we lament on the other side.

Tulsidas says to give up such attachment. Rather than living a life of conditions, which only benefit me when they fall a certain way, be dedicated in seva to the Supreme Lord, Shri Rama. Follow this seva, service, with good character and love. Do so for Rama’s benefit. In the same way that we remain vigilant in the care of a loved one, so we should always feel that Rama requires our devotional efforts, that He is satisfied by them, that He is always pleased when we think of Him.

By following this recommendation, which is simply another way to describe pure bhakti-yoga, we will always find sukhada. We will be happy whether coming together in good fortune, samyoga, or separating due to the influence of time, viyoga. That separation is the only guarantee after the association, but devotion to Shri Rama withstands any and all conditions that might try to get in the way.

In Closing:

Sometimes by abuses defeated,
Or in the opposite way treated.

That pleasant the children and wife,
Those near and dear in life.

Tulsi for seva recommending,
Good character to Rama extending.

For sukhada lasting and true,
In good and bad times too.

Categories: dohavali 121-160, the two

Tags: family, friends, god, hare krishna, poem, poems, poetry, tulsidas